The book and material are excellent, so I want to share what I wrote here.

Please consider treating yourself to this book!

Best,
Pat

Amazon.com review:

If you want to finally break the panic/anxiety cycle, READ THIS BOOK,
October 30, 2008
By P. Merrill (Scottsdale, AZ USA) – See all my reviews

There are many good books available today that tackle the issues of
anxiety and panic disorder. I’ve read and reviewed the majority of them
since the 1980s, and I featured several in ENcourage Newsletter (no
longer in print) for the benefit of folks with panic disorder and
agoraphobia.

But I’d like to make it clear that this particular book and author truly offers the most immediate, practical help I’ve seen.

In keeping with Judith Bemis’ previous book, Embracing the Fear: Learning To Manage Anxiety & Panic Attacks,
the reader finds “real world” examples and full explanations of the
actual USE OF ACCEPTANCE in anxious situations. This fills a big gap in
available literature.

More importantly, perhaps, is the clarity with which ACCEPTANCE is
described and defined. (Readers will be relieved to know that
acceptance is far from resignation!) The paradox and living experience
of true acceptance is what heals us—on many levels.

Rather than ardent striving and controlling (which is exhausting
and futile), one will learn just how to treat anxiety with a light
touch and gentle spirit. And it works beautifully.

Additionally, subjects such as journaling, medication, origins of
anxiety, goals, setbacks, and the support persons’ perspective are
discussed thoughtfully.

Because the author herself is a recovered agoraphobic (her panic
attacks began in 1965, before much help or information was even
available) and has very successfully helped countless others through
the support network Open Door Outreach, Inc., which she founded, her
words convey authentically her great compassion and wisdom.

Simply stated, this new book will provide new hope, much food for
thought, and the key to lasting recovery. It is a MUST READ—no doubt
about it.

Pat Merrill

Founder, ENcourage Connection

http://www.encourageconnection.com

As a woman who has experienced it, I can say in no uncertain terms that there has been a certain stigma attached, but somehow people are a tad more forgiving toward females. 

Men in most cultures are expected to be above fear, or at least to appear to be above it. Silliness.  How ridiculously unfair.

My visitors here already know that panic attacks are no respecter of gender—or anything else, for that matter. 

While I could focus this little blog post on statistics or male celebrities with panic disorder, I really just want to point out how interesting it is that there are a number of online panic disorder recovery programs created by MEN who have overcome their anxiety disorder.  What should this tell us?

Although there are a quite a few such programs, I am going to highlight one that intrigues me.  The intriguing part is simply that the creator of it says he’ll answer all e-mails from the users!  (That’s quite a feat considering how many e-mails come my way, and I’m not even  selling a program of help!)

The program is called EasyCalm.  Jon Mercer offers this.  Allow me to simply share one of his articles, below.  I think it says much about his attitude and integrity and compassion.  (Don’t you?)

Be ENcouraged,
Pat
>>>>>>>>>Article by Jon Mercer follows…

You Get What You Give

As many of you already know, I talk a lot about personal responsibility and I believe that none of us are victims. We are all actively involved in the process of creating our lives every single day. And even though many people would agree with this statement, it can be easy to slip back into that old "victim" mindset from time to time. After all, it can seem pretty comfortable being a victim: 
it reminds us of being infants when all our needs where attended to by someone else. And at that stage of development, we truly were "victims."

But as good as it may feel to play the victim sometimes, doing so also strips us of our power.  We become helpless to the forces around us, including anxiety, stress and panic.  So it is of utmost importance to throw away any idea of victimization, and accept 100% responsibility for our lives–the good AND the bad.

This last point can be hard for some people to accept at first. In fact, it was very hard for me at first. I was more than willing to take responsibility for the good things, but, like many people, I resisted taking responsibility for the bad things. It seemed too much like "beating myself up" and I knew that was counterproductive.
 
The idea that we are personally responsible for the bad things in our
  lives–even the things we are complaining about–can be a hard pill to swallow. 
But once you "get" this concept, and begin to assume responsibility for everything in your life, it is very empowering. It gives you back a certain level of control, and you stop waiting for someone or something outside yourself
  to rush in and "fix" the situation. Because the fact is, no one can fix your situation. We all have to do it ourselves.

Now, keeping this idea of personal responsibility in mind, let’s talk about what you are putting out into the world.  What I’m talking about here is the balance that exists between what you are giving, and what you’re getting.  The 
thing is, these two are very closely related.  What you get is largely determined by what you give.  So if you’re not getting the results you want in your life, you need to take a good look at what you were putting out there.

Now right at this point is where I lose some people. They will say, "This all sounds great, but I haven’t seen any evidence of this in my life–can you prove what you’re saying?"

I can really relate to this question and the skepticism behind it because I too felt this way for many years. I didn’t see the connection between what I was "putting out into the world" and what I was getting back.
  In fact, it seemed pretty random to me. But when I began to take a closer look at it, I did begin to see the connection–very clearly in fact.

And if you will think about your own life and your experiences, you will probably see the connection too. If this concept seems too "out there" for you, just look at it from a strictly scientific point of view: "like causes produce like effects."
  In other words, "If you keeping doing the same things, you will keep getting the same results." And that is not only common sense, it is the standard all good science is based on.

So, understanding this concept, what do you need to do to get more of the results you want and less of what you don’t? Being the "listmaker" I am, I have compiled a few ideas to think about. These go beyond "fixing" anxiety and into the realm of helping you live a better life in every area.

1. Feel GREAT about where you are are right now. Focus on what is good about your situation and who you are. Remember, it is easier to improve upon a good situation than
  to turn around a bad situation.

2. Don’t think in terms of lack (what you are missing); think in terms of going toward good things, NOT trying to get away from the bad (anxiety for example).

3. Do as many things as you possibly can that make you feel good. Feeling good is so important, especially feeling good about yourself. People are naturally attracted to others who radiate positive feelings about themselves. Anything that makes you happy will help your life in a million ways.

4. Do things for others when it does not benefit you at all, and wanting nothing from them in return (not even a thank you). Help out someone just to do it–no other reason. As you begin to do this, you will notice an unusual law of nature. You can not give to others and receive nothing back. 
It never happens. What goes around DOES come around.

Jon Mercer    Click Here!

Well there missus, we are not dogs so what does this have to do with the price of panicky potatoes? Panic attacks make me believe I cannot fly. They slow me down, they make me stop trying, they never ever live in the present moment. They are running days, weeks, months ahead and focussing on every possible negative scenario from the past. Even positive, wonderful moments from my memory will be portrayed as awful dramas unworthy of even the worst soap opera award.

My dog doesn’t identify with painful memories, nor lack of wings, nor does he worry one whit what tomorrow will bring. He sees things quite clearly. I am here, I am in the now, I am love. Ta da!

In fact he doesn’t identify with egoic thoughts such as: "What if that squirrel comes back next week? What if we run out of treats? You know, I really ought to stop jumping like that, I might break a toe, I remember that time I hurt my paw, I had to spend days in the crate and visited the Poke and Stick doctor…" Nope, none of that.  With him, It’s 1-2-3 FLING in the air. 1-2-3 FLING even higher. Fail? Try again. Fun! Ouch! Get back up. Yay! Unbridled enthusiasm lesson 101.

Short of mastering the Art of Zen Whippetry, I practice taming the present moment, for it is, in fact, all I have. Past is gone, future doesn’t exist, it’s been said a million times, but we don’t adhere to it or else we could easily chuck the panic suit no problem. And, an ugly sweaty orange lycra spandex suit, no less. Identifying with a panic filled thought, making it mine, and adding its repertoire to my inner being, is, quite frankly, fraudulent. It doesn’t belong there, it is not who I am. It lies.

It is not who you are. Repeat it after me. Panic is not who I am. 

Yes, I truly admire my dog. He knows who he is, where he is and what he wants. He has wings, he can fly, never a bad hair day and he never ever wears a suit. A cape, perhaps, but never a suit.

Carry on,

Kate

Initially, when people were told that emotional and/or mental issues were "all in the head," it was inferred that we could or SHOULD think or feel differently;  there was little basis to assume that physiology or biochemistry was at fault.  There was shame and blame felt.

SO, when science started pointing a finger at faulty chemistry in the brain, many were downright relieved.  "Aha! See?  It is not my fault!  It’s just like DIABETES!"   

Is it that simple?

I don’t think so.  A chunk of info has been left out:  Every thought we think affects our brain chemistry!

We DO have some "control" or some responsibility for what is seen going on in our brains. 

Of course, that is oversimplified.  A brain injury, for example, isn’t changed with a simple thought, per se. 

However, mood and emotion, and choice in response, is still the mandate of the conscious mind.

I won’t go into more detail here, except to say that I bring this up to point out a new way to think about our situations with anxiety.  We are more than our brain chemistry, and pharmaceuticals are simply NOT the ONLY route to affecting change in it.   Perhaps I can find some interesting links to share in the future, that better explain just how brain chemistry is modulated by our thinking and actions (as opposed to simply assuming pharmaceuticals are the only way).  Just think about a sucking on a lemon slice for a while, and you’ll soon see how your brain just sent a message to your salivary glands to turn on, even though you have no lemon at all….

Of course, medication can be helpful.  I know because I take some myself! 

But, in my humble opinion, I must continue to oversee and witness my thoughts and to take great responsibility for my reactions, decisions and even mood.  I can take responsibility for my brain health, too, with proper exercise and very specific nutritional choices. I can make a huge difference in my brain’s activity AND I can override any genetic predisposition.  Genetic expression is not a given.

In any case, what good is shame or blame?  There isn’t a person on the planet who will not come face to face with challenges, insecurities or "issues."  We are on equal footing, and there is no shame in being anxious, any more than there is shame in having diabetes.

And, to me, it isn’t because of supposed faulty biochemistry that I am off the hook.  It is because I am a human being, experiencing a chance to grow and better myself—–just like everybody else.

Be ENcouraged!
Pat

And who wouldn’t? 

You have every right to decide when, where and how you will approach your dealings with anxiety. Yet I would humbly suggest:  Don’t wait endlessly, in fear, for the perfect answer or a magic pill.

So many of us have complained that this or that program didn’t "cure" us. 

Or we procrastinate, fearing to try ANYTHING!  I understand. It’s scary! 

But every step we take–no matter how tiny, no matter how imperfect–brings us closer to healing.

And do we have to be "perfectly cured, perfectly normal" to have a worthwhile life?  After much contemplation, I believe it’s simply not the only goal. You can live a valued life no matter what.

We have to start somewhere.  There are all SORTS of competing products, competing ideas, and possibly confusing data.  It can feel overwhelming and paralyzing.  But I urge you:  START SOMEWHERE!

If money is an issue, then choose wisely.  For example, there are great books and workbooks that can get us going in a wonderful direction (if we are willing to DO the exercises and so forth).  These books, of course, are very cost-effective compared to weekly therapy.

No matter how much money you have to spend, though, remember that you are making an important and worthwhile investment–in YOU.   

Give something a try.  Fail, if that should happen.  It’s all learning. Be willing to make mistakes.  Be willing to make progress.  Simply be willing.  Keep trying new things until you find what feels right to you!

Feeling good about yourself and your life is within reach. 

Moving forward, if only an inch, feels better than standing still, frozen in fear.  What shall we wait for?

Be ENcouraged!
Pat

I must confess, I’m a "bookaholic!"  I have loved to read all of my life.  LOVE it!

Have you heard the term "bibliotherapy?"  It actually has a few slightly different meanings, but I find it to be a fantastic form of therapy, no matter how defined.

Which is why you’ll see a lot of book recommendations from me (thus the Amazon widgets you’ll notice on this blog and our site).  I’ll mention specific books or helpful products from time to time.  (Note: Your purchases do help us maintain our site, so many thanks to you if you should ever buy from these links.)

Having had panic disorder/anxiety, I found–as many do–that reading and re-reading those things that assist us in our healing process can be a godsend.  It is sometimes like having a personal therapist in your hands.  I know I’ve had a lot of "Aha!" moments, while reading, as I gained a better understanding of my experience.  So many amazing insights arise….

Additionally, as a publisher of a newsletter on this subject, I was sent gobs of review copies of books in the field of anxiety disorders.  It was great to read each one, and often write about them in the newsletter. 

Of course, reading is not enough.  Acting upon that newfound knowledge is what it really takes to see progress.  That knowledge truly is power when put to use. 

I should add:  Don’t let seemingly conflicting information confuse and paralyze you!  Just take what feels right to you, and discard the rest—-or even save that other info for a time in the future. There will always be differences in opinions, but only you know what is best for you at any given moment.   Your own discernment is all that is needed.

Be ENcouraged!
-Pat, at ENcourage

So, in the latter part of the 1980s, I utilized my professional background to create a print newsletter (ENcourage Newsletter) which was sent around the globe for 8 years.  When Internet usage became more and more common, I put a halt to the mailings and subscriptions, and simply placed some of our most relevant material on our website—ENcourage Connection.  I knew then, what I know now: There is no better way to provide a supportive outreach than to utilize our amazing World Wide Web!

Why did I have this interest?  I developed panic disorder as a college student in the late 1970s.  At that time, there was very little help.  I felt lucky, though, that I lived in Los Angeles, CA at the time, and did have some access to knowledgeable help. 

At that time, I was shooting for a major in journalism, combined with nutritional sciences, so it later became a natural extension of me to write about what I had learned and was learning.   The newsletter was born, and I was also involved in other peer support work.  Throughout, I met with and interviewed great doctors and therapists and authors, as well as recovered and recovering, brave people from many places.  It had always been an honor and privilege to learn this way and to share with so many good people.

Today I live in Scottsdale, AZ, with my husband Will and daughter Jaimee.  I still feel that "call" to help others.  My own anxiety experience waxes and wanes, but compared to "the old days" when I was practically housebound with constant panic attacks, I live a very peaceful life!  I worked hard for that.  I made many, many changes in behavior, in habits, in attitudes . . . and much more.  I’ll speak more to that throughout this blog home.

As I develop this blog site extension of our website
(http://www.encourageconnection.com), you will enjoy contributions
provided by some wonderful "regulars" and newer "guest authors."  As
always, my deepest hope is to be of help to you.  I understand, all too
well, the depth of the agonies that can be felt in this; but, I also
know the amazing sense of grace and enlightenment that becomes the
greater part of ourselves for having had to walk this path.

I believe the opportunity to heal is greater than ever.  Let’s journey together and find our own unique pathways to freedom and joy!

Be ENcouraged!

Heartfelt good wishes to you all,
Pat